So Long 2012

And for my last post of 2012...

And Here It Is.. Your Moment of Zen

Too much rambling, not enough pictures lately. So here is a picture of my beloved Honda (sometime before I locked her keys in the trunk) taking in a beautiful sunset in Balcones Canyonlands National Wildlife Refuge

Not Your Stereotypical New Year's Resolution

Recently I have realized that nearly every aspect of my life is in total disarray. It would be nice to make a few New Year's Resolutions to try and rectify things, but I fear that is not enough. I need a total life overhaul. 

 For starters, I am making a conscious decision not smoke anymore. I realize it is unrealistic to expect I can just quit cold turkey, and never touch another one. But with the help of my family and friends I feel that this is something I can do. My Uncle Dominic died in 2010 after living many many years with only one lung, and here I am taking both of mine for granted. Not cool. My 81 year old Gram is struggling every day to breathe as she is missing half of one of her lungs. I can no longer abuse mine while she is suffering. 

My finances are a mess. I have never been one to plan for the future but the older I get the more I realize I need some kind of safety net. After this summer I will have a significant portion of my debt paid off and from there  I can begin saving. Better late than never, right?

My health is a mess. I am not going to go into specific detail on this blog, but I will say I am in need of some medical services that I am totally unable to afford without health insurance. That old phrase "pre-existing condition" keeps rearing its ugly head. But hopefully this summer I will be able to afford at least a modest health care plan. Eventually I hope to have surgery to correct my right shoulder, among other things. 

My personal relationships with some friends and family also seem to be a mess. I have let some slip into the cracks and I need to rectify these situations. I have to put my personal pride aside and deal with certain conflicts. It won't be easy but I'll do it. 

My belongings are always a mess, but I have truly been making great strides this year in minimizing the crap that I own. I got rid of about 5 car loads of stuff this past fall when I downsized my storage unit. I am unable to get rid of everything as there are certain things of sentimental value. I feel that the next time I go I will be able to downsize further and finally be able to remove my excess crap from Gram's house and put it all into my tiny 5x5 storage unit. Sometimes it is hard to let go of physical objects, but it is freeing once you do. My biggest fear is ending up like one of those crazy people on Hoarders, crying over throwing away a piece of trash. So I routinely force myself to purge my belongings. And I think I am better for it. 

Currently I am in a situation that is less than ideal, but the end is in sight. I can survive anything and I have much more patience than I give myself credit for. On the negative side, I can hardly afford food after paying my monthly bills. But on the positive side, I have lost ten pounds this month. You win some, you lose some. 

The Texas Belgian Waffle

It's no secret that I love hotels. But what I really love are TEXAS hotels. Why, you ask? Well I love Texas hotels because of the Texas-shaped Belgian waffles of course.

Add caption

I travel. A lot. Sometimes I camp, sometimes I stay with friends along the way, and other times I get to stay in a hotel. Most times I stay in a hotel out of neccessity. Today I am in a hotel because I feel like it. Merry Christmas to me!

Hakuna Matata..

Part of growing up for me has meant learning to accept people and things as they are. And while some things are constantly changing, others never will.


I live a life of constant change. I move multiple times a year and people come in and out of my life in a constant steady flow. Most people I meet are in my life for only a short time, and that is fine with me. We have a good time while we are working together or associated in some other way and then we part ways. Being that I don't have facebook I don't maintain artificial relationships with people that I otherwise wouldn't. That's not to say I completely lose touch with people, as I do have a cell phone and e-mail and I do periodically check in with them to see how they are or perhaps ask them a question.

Other people I meet enter my life on a more permanent basis. My closest friends are people that I have known most of my life. These people know me better than anyone, and while we are often apart we are always in touch and see each other when we can. I am, however, still meeting people as an adult who become very important to me, and I wish to keep up a more consistent relationship than other acquaintances. That is to say, I am still adding close friends to my circle.

There is a poem/ saying that someone once sent me titled "Reason, Season, or Lifetime" which really sums up the types of relationships we find in life.

Reason, Season, or Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

— Unknown

While the poem may be slightly cheesy it says some things I can certainly relate to with the number of people coming in and out of my life all the time. 

Occasionally there are people who unexpectedly become permanent fixtures in my life. Other times there are people who I really hope to be in my life for a lifetime, but for some reason or another they fade away eventually. I can't really predict who will stay and who will go, but that is okay. Sometimes it is difficult to accept that someone will no longer be in my life, but I do my best to accept it with grace and move on. As I said earlier- part of growing up is learning to accept things. I have learned to accept that there are things and people I can not change. Quite frankly it sucks sometimes, but it is life and there is truly nothing I can do about it. To paraphrase one of my favorite disney movies: "Hakuna matata.. it means no worries". 

... and as for romantic relationships- my love for travel and dedication to shorebird biology have made it impossible to maintain one. So, I guess those fall under "seasonal" relationships. Too bad too... I've met one or two that I hoped would last more than a season. C'est la vie. 

Where Did I Leave Off....

I have much to say but I will try to keep it short.


In late August, my second summer working for Virginia Tech on the Missouri River came to a close. It was a long, hot summer but I think it was productive and memorable nonetheless. We had lots of adorable baby plovers, and that is what counts.

After leaving South Dakota I headed west and began a 2 week road trip. I visited the Corn Palace in Mitchell, SD. Now that is certainly quite a sight to see, although they were sad to report to me that the drought made them unable to change out this years corn design on the outside of the building. I spent a night camping in the Black Hills and managed to do a drive by of both Mount Rushmore and the Crazy Horse Monument the next morning. After that I spent an evening back in my old stomping grounds; Pinedale, WY. I spent the evening with my good friend Liz, went for a great hike in the mountains and had some great beers at my favorite brewery, Wind River Brewing.

After Pinedale I cruised through Jackson Hole and then proceeded onto Cameron, Montana where I spent a week relaxing, and learning how to fly fish and row a drift boat with a friend and former North Cove alum. Not too shabby. I made friends with a bad ass one-eyed cat named Mo, after the Mighty Missouri River.

Upon leaving Montana I made a turn southeast through Yellowstone and set off to visit some family and friends in Asheville, NC. It was a great time and I was happy to see my family and go hiking with a good friend. I then spent a night in Blacksburg, VA visiting with some good friends and having a few beers. After my evening in VA I headed to Mom's house in Lancaster, PA. Finally, on September 14, I made it home to CT for a baby shower. I am proud to report that very baby was born today (December 14). Welcome to the world Lincoln Xavier Dean :)

For approximately 6 weeks I stayed at home in CT with Gram. I had a good time, even when I was washing windows with my uncle. I saw all my family and friends, went for some epic fall hikes, and survived Hurricane Sandy. After a week with no power, cooking ramen on the front porch with my camp stove, it was nearly time for me to set off on another epic road trip. Joined this time by my friend Sam, I set out west toward Montana again. We managed to outrun the snow storm in the north east only to be faced with an epic snowstorm in Montana. Luckily we made it to our destination unharmed. It took a little patience and a lot of time but we made it through.

After 2 weeks playing in the snow and eating elk meat (and cooking one seriously awesome Turkey dinner), I set off yet again. First I spent a night in Moab, UT. I was pleased to have a bit of time the next morning to check out Canyonlands National Park. I also made a stop at the 4 Corners of the U.S. Monument. I am proud to say that I stood in 4 states at once. I came to rest that evening at my auntie's house in Rio Rancho, NM. I spent a few days there visiting with the Auntie and the Uncle and some cousins. I learned how to play cribbage. I'd say it was a productive few days.

After New Mexico I met up with Steph in Texas where we split a hotel room en route to our final destination of Laguna Atascosa National Wildlife Refuge. We are just about as far south in Texas as you can get. What, you may ask, am I doing in Texas again? Well I am looking at Piping Plovers. Like you really had to ask. After this week we will be heading north to my beloved Padre Island. I am excited to spend 2 months back in Corpus Christi.

So... now you know where I have been and what I have been doing for the last 3 months.

SOMETIMES...

Sometimes I feel like screaming from the top of my lungs.

Sometimes I do it.

Salt Water

I have lived all over this great country of ours. I have lived in the deserts of New Mexico, the mountains of western Wyoming, the plains of South Dakota, the bayou of Louisiana, and many more I'm not even remembering.

I have lived in all these places and learned to love them for all their unique properties. Alas, I am never truly happy until I am home by the sea. I tried living on the west coast, but every time I drove north, the ocean was on the wrong side. The Texas Gulf coast was alright I guess, but the beaches covered in pick up trucks and RV's were no match for a beautiful rocky New England coast line..


Next on my agenda is the Pacific Northwest, and the Big Sky Country of Montana. Eventually I will find my way home to the Atlantic coast where I will be happy to be. In the mean time I have a lot more exploring to do...

I suppose I have no point in my rambling except to say that right now I miss the smell of the salt air ..

Finding my own motivation via Google

You know it's bad when you have to google motivational images

R.I.P. Curtis

At 4:30 this morning I came out to the kitchen and cheerfully greeted Curtis as I do every morning. He did not come out to the sound of my voice. I then turned on his light, as this usually draws him out of his little tent if my chipper greeting does not do the trick. Alas, he did not come out. Lastly, I sprinkled some food in the tank. It was then that I knew something was wrong. Curtis does NOT miss breakfast.

I am sad to report that sometime between 9:00 last night and 4:30 this morning, Curtis passed away. I feel like I lost a good friend. He has been with me every day since May of last year. We go every where together. My road trips will certainly be very lonely from now on. And who will eat breakfast with me?

Boats and Birds

Well folks, as you probably know I am spending yet another summer of my life chasing around good ol' Charadrius melodus, aka the Piping Plover.

My hand and the Piping Plover that just flew out of it

I am once again stationed in Vermillion, South Dakota for the summer. This year, however, the Mighty Mo is not flooded, and we are getting tons of work done on our stretch of river below the Gavin's Point Dam in Yankton, SD. Of course I have not forgotten about my beloved Niobrara River in Nebraska, and I visit her once a week (ish). I like driving our skiff, but I think paddling will always be my preferred mode of transportation.

Things started off slow this year; the birds seemed to take their sweet time returning from their wintering grounds in the Gulf of Mexico and on the Atlantic Coast. Once they got here they wasted no time getting eggs on the ground. We had our first chicks hatch last Saturday and they've been popping up all over the place since then. It is quite difficult to focus on work when you have adorable baby plover chicks all over the place...

This nest hatched today.. well, most of it did anyway

Other than all the birdy business.. things have been pretty quiet around here. I am missing the ocean quite a bit these days but trying to convince myself that the River is an acceptable alternative. I miss everyone back home, but I am surrounded by lots of good friends out here to keep me busy.

Sadness

Today we lost our friend and brother Matt. I don't have words to express what this feels like.

We will miss you more than you know.

Killingworth man dies in early morning crash

The End of an Era

Yesterday was a sad day.

Five years ago I was an unemployed freshly graduated college student. I had no job and no direction. Based on the recommendation of my old friend Alex, I decided to apply at North Cove Outfitters. It was perfect. I learned all about the wide world of outdoor gear. (How I wish I knew about synthetic baselayers and gore-tex membranes when I was freezing my butt off during field classes in college). Over the next 5 years I worked at North Cove between field jobs. I can't express how grateful I have been to have a job that will always take me back with welcome arms. Sometimes I am gone on my bird chasing adventures for a year at a time. Long story short, North Cove is my second home, and my coworkers are my second family.

Yesterday it was revealed to us that North Cove Outfitters will be closing its doors after 23.5 years in business. It was a sad day for those of us who work there. Now that the news is out it will be a sad day for all of the store's loyal customers. I started the day blissfully unaware of the closure, and ended the day hanging giant yellow and red "Store Closing" signs all over the store. That was certainly not how I had expected my day to go..

Why I Hate the Keurig Machine

Several years ago, some of my relatives were proud to show me their fancy new Keurig coffee makers. I was immediately appalled at the dozens of miniature plastic cups they so proudly displayed on their cutesy little K-cup "trees".  I had hoped that this fad would wear off quickly, but it has not. Several years later the machines have seemingly taken over every home in America. 

As a an environmentalist at heart, I immediately shun the thought of all these single serve, non-recyclable plastic cups. Whenever I express this concern to any Keurig owner, they immediately say "Oh don't worry, Keurig makes a re-usable stainless steel filter cup!". That's just fine and dandy, except that NOT ONE OF YOU ACTUALLY USE IT. Jerks. 

In 2011, over 5 BILLION K-cups were bought. That's 5 BILLION non-recyclable plastic cups rotting in our landfills. I know Keurig states that they are "working on" recyclable options but honestly, recyclable cups only do good if people actually recycle them. We know americans aren't the best recyclers. 

I was also disappointed to see that Green Mountain Coffee owns Keurig now. As a young college activist, I had worked closely with Green Mountain executives to help me get my university on board with fair trade coffee. As you may or may not know, coffee farmers rarely get paid a livable wage for their product. Often coffee farmers turn to growing more illegal crops in order to support their families. Fair Trade coffee ensures coffee farmers get a fair wage for their product. I guess I had assumed that since Green Mountain is socially responsible, and based in the  Green Mountains of Vermont, that they would be environmentally responsible as well. 

My last gripe with the Keurig machine is that the COFFEE IS NOT GOOD. Every cup of coffee I have had from a Keurig machine is weak, and barely fills the cup. And should you decide to change the setting to make a bigger cup, it gets even weaker. I fail to see the attraction of the Keurig machine. 

If you need me I'll be at Cumberland Farms or Dunkin Donuts with my re-usable mug....

Things I Miss About Being A Child

It is 7:55 am on a Saturday morning. I am currently watching the Penguins of Madagascar cartoon on Nick (That's Nickelodeon to those of us from older generations).

If I were a child, I would be able to lay here comfortably enjoying cartoons for the next few hours. Instead I am anxiously watching the clock. I must get up and get ready for work. I also have to account for time to clear the frost and snow off of my car because it is indeed winter.  Fortunately the snow only amounted to a light dusting, so clean up will be quick today.

Winter to a child means 2 things: SNOW DAYS and sledding. Winter to an adult means 2 things: SHOVELING and a longer commute to work. The child in me loves to wake up and see a freshly fallen blanket of snow. And as I am shoveling, the child in me finds some pleasure in making mini snowmen along the way. It doesn't take long for the adult in me to quickly become annoyed as I shovel my way to my car. It is usually the town's dim-witted plow truck driver plowing my car into a snow bank that sets me off. By the time I get to work in a snow storm I find myself angry and cursing mother nature for ever inventing such an evil substance. Were I still a child, I could still look upon snow as a blessing from above. Perhaps if grown-ups got snow days and were allowed to go sledding all day I would retain that childlike admiration.


I would say that I miss exploring the woods and playing outside all day long, however I as an adult I have managed to find a way to get myself paid for exploring outside all day.  As a child I was never really happy being stuck indoors and I never grew out of it. Next month I will return to field work and it will be glorious.

And now I must go get ready for work... (Indoor work selling outdoor gear).

The Internet is Scary.

Recently, while attempting to internet stalk my missing cousin, I discovered some frightening things about the internet. Not only did the magical internet find lots of records for my cousin, but it knew we were related. When I clicked on my own name, I was even more disturbed to see how much the internet knows about me.

There are a number of directory "aggregate" sites which compile information about you. I am currently in the process of deleting my name and info from as many sites as possible. One of the scariest is called spokeo.com. This website knows your age, your address (and any prior addresses). It knows your relatives, your phone number, and scariest of all, it shows a google image of your house. It also tells your credit score and the value of your home. It's disturbing. So far I have discovered this is the way to remove yourself from spokeo.com

Here's how to remove your name:

1. Go to Spokeo.com and type in your name.
2. Copy the URL when it brings up your information
3. Go to the bottom of the page and click on "privacy"
4. Paste the URL in the box provided
5. Include your email address (it gives you further instructions via email)
6. Enter the code
7. Go to your email and click on the link they provide to you
8. Confirm the directory listing has been deleted
9. Go back to Spokeo.com and put in your name to be sure it was deleted

Do yourself a favor and start googling yourself. So far I have removed myself from mylife.com and spokeo. I am in the process of trying to remove myself from peekyou.com

I am learning quickly that there is an endless supply of information about me on the internet. If all these "aggregate" sites are getting all my info there must be more out there than I will ever know about. 

Dear Alyssa Milano...

Dear Alyssa Milano,


Please stop begging me for money to save the children. I appreciate the work you are doing for UNICEF, but I do not have any money to spare. Last week I sold all my jewelry to put gas in my tank and food in my stomach. This week I had to spend all of my christmas money on an awesome trip to a walk-in clinic on new year's eve because of my sinus infection from hell.

Long story short, Alyssa, I do not have 50 cents a day to send you to feed that adorable little starving child. Begging me at every single commercial break is not going to change the fact that I do not have any money to send you. Please stop. Seriously.

I bet you are still earning royalties for Who's the Boss and Charmed re-runs. And I see you are now making Lifetime made-for-TV movies. I am sure you can spare enough change for the both of us.

While you're at it, tell Sarah Mclachlan to knock it off with the ASPCA commercials. I give all my spare change to the animal shelter whenever I see a donation can around town. Singing sappy songs and showing injured puppies does not make me want to donate it makes me want to change the channel.

Sincerely,
  Audrey